WE WILL BUY YOUR TEETH

Tired of excess teeth crowding your mouth?

THEN TIRE NO MORE: WE WILL BUY YOUR TEETH!

Looking to get some extra cash in these tough economic times?

THEN LOOK NO MORE: WE WILL BUY YOUR TEETH!

Enjoying the ability to chew food?

THEN ENJOY NO MORE:

WE

WILL

BUY

YOUR

TEETH!!!!!!!

RIMMERMAN FINANCIAL SERVICES AND CASUAL DENTISTRY
will buy any and all of your teeth at

TEN

TWENTY

even TWENTY-ONE times their original market value!!!

Would you get that same deal from THE MOB?!?! NO!

ORGANIZED CRIME CAN'T OFFER WHAT RIMMERMAN CAN!

When we say we will BUY YOUR TEETH, we MEAN IT. ANY and ALL teeth will be accepted:

BICUSPIDS

MOLARS

WISDOM TEETH

BUCKTEETH

FANGS

and even BICUSPIDS!!!

Quick cash! Money down! No questions asked! You send us the teeth, and we send you MONEY!!!

$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$$

and best of all: ALL THE MONEY WILL BE IN SACAJAWEA DOLLAR COINS!!!

Bad credit? No credit? NO PROBLEM!

WE DON'T HAVE CREDIT EITHER, so we're in the SAME BOAT!

Can the U.S. GOVERNMENT say the same? YES!

BUT THEY WILL NOT BUY YOUR TEETH!!!

WE WILL! AND WE'LL DO IT TODAY!!!

Check out these TRUE LIFE TESTIMONIALS:

"I sent them my teeth and they sent me money!" - Steve, USA

WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT TO HEAR?!?! You have teeth. We have money.

IT'S THE PERFECT SITUATION!

Don't want to remove the teeth yourself?

FINE.

For a nominal fee, RIMMERMAN will send one of our CERTIFIED CASUAL DENTISTS to remove your teeth IN-HOME... or ON THE ROAD!!!

Will the Tooth Fairy do that? NO!

What else won't the Tooth Fairy do?

BUSINESS WITH PEOPLE OLDER THAN TEN.


SOUNDS PRETTY FUCKING CREEPY TO US!!!


We will STAY AWAY FROM YOUR CHILDREN!!!

GUARANTEED!!!

EVEN THIS GUY WILL STAY AWAY FROM YOUR CHILDREN!!!



We here at RIMMERMAN make it OUR BUSINESS to STAY AWAY FROM YOUR CHILDREN, no matter how GROWN-UP THEY SEEM!!!!

Now that's TRUST!!!

What are you waiting for?

CALL 1-800-BUY-TEEF today for a FREE CONSULTATION -- NOWHERE NEAR YOUR CHILDREN!!! -- and get ready for a NEW LIFE of UNLIMITED FINANCIAL OPPORTUNITIES and EXTREMELY LIMITED JAW FUNCTIONALITY!!!

RIMMERMAN FINANCIAL SERVICES AND CASUAL DENTISTRY:

NOWHERE NEAR YOUR CHILDREN SINCE 1985